As an Indian woman, how do you feel when you drink water?
by neo
As you drink water, as the life-sustaining nectar that is as old as the Vedas and is as fresh as this moment washes away the tiredness of your long day, what do you think of? As an Indian woman water-drinker, do you find yourself wondering if the water will be safe for your husband and children? Do you feel sympathy for those who don’t have water? Do you feel any sort of primordial spiritual awakening? These are the sorts of questions that we Indian non-women will never know the answer to, because Indian women writers like you are failing to discharge your responsibility.
After India’s World Cup win, I eagerly waited for your post; I was disappointed. I did see your tweet, “YAAAAAAYYYYY!” but I wish you had written something more evocative—something that captured how an Indian woman twitterer feels about the victory of a country her sisters literally gave birth to. Even if you felt more nocturnal than maternal, I would have loved to hear your perspective as an Indian woman post-world-cup-victory-party-goer.
Let me explain why this issue is dear to me. After my mother died, I resolved to keep my memory of her alive by educating young Indian women about their true identity as young Indian women. For International Women’s day, I wrote an essay titled, “Indian woman: life-giver or life-liver?” In my essay I argue that Indian women are not thinking enough about their Indian womanhood. I emailed it to all the women I know, but the person I wanted most to read it was my nineteen-year-old niece, “B.”
B. is a smart young woman, but she spends all her time reading Richard Powers, Cormac McCarthy and Haruki Murakami. How is this going to help her become a modern Indian woman? When I called her up to discuss my essay, she said she had deleted my mail and emptied the trash, “by accident.” I sort of lost my temper and asked her directly if she knew what it meant to be an Indian woman—she giggled as if I were asking her to be my mother. She has no clue. She has no idea who she is.
And that’s why I’m writing to you: I know B. reads your blog. I beg you to inject more Indian womanhood in your writing. I understand that everyone cannot be Namesake like Jhumpa Lahiri, but is it too much to ask to add a little mandir in your jokes about the mind, a pretty mangalsutra around your insights about marriage? Can you not be a little less meta and be a little more meetha?
Please do consider my appeal. Otherwise, I fear the worst: that being an Indian woman will cease to mean anything more than being just a regular human being.
Don’t we? Don’t we all write as Indians, the way we see India?
I mean, it may not be India in the “traditional” sense, but it is a part of what India is today, no?
And I don’t see men being asked to blog about dhotis and kadas to preserve their Indianness :)
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a traveller,
I should do a post about men, but I thought I’d do it post women.
-n
Hot debate. What do you think?
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Yes. And that should be followed by a post for the others, ummm.. the other ones you know. They are also Indians like moms, dhotis and Poonam Pandeys…I mean, you understood, didn’t you? Excluding them would be a different this one
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Bhopale,
Bingo! You nailed it.
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Seems to me you have, quite rightly, idealised your mother and no other Indian woman can live up to this ideal.
Frankly, I’m a bit fed up of being told what I can or can’t wear, read, eat, say, think by Indian men who have no idea whatsoever about me or my life. Partly why I’m married to an Englishman, I guess.
Or this might be a very clever and subtle satire.
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msalliance,
I’m inclined to agree.
-Neo
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Seems Neo couldn’t get up after this one. :-)
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The “Ms. Goddess of all things Roy” and the “Ms. I make news Ghose” in me (both equally Indian women) jump with delight at this one.
This is the real pressing problem of the minority population of the country that is characterised by neglect and is left to suffer.
Brilliant piece of work, this one. :P
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I was writing a song about how the globe on the top of the cup-which-does-not-look-like-a-cup symbolizes the modern Indian woman.
But then my baby started crying in the next room. I tried to breast feed it while recording backing vocals to the song in my home studio (which also allows me the time to complete my thesis in neuroscience) and I suddenly went – Meh. I don’t wanna.
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Purnima Rao,
Don’t ask what your Indian womanhood can do for you, ask what you can do for your Indian womanhood.
-n
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Ha, ha. I see what you’re doing here.
*goes back to writing ad about the (pink) credit card specially designed for Indian women*
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Neo at times I wonder if you’re even Indian, a tourist would realize that the Indian woman doesn’t exist. Even restricting ourselves to the upper class there are South Indian Hindu women, Muslim women, Kashmiri Women, Bengali women etc. all with radically different ideas on gender roles; nevertheless I shall play along.
There is no sight more disgusting than these Murakami reading harpies, who grow up with every privilege and encouragement, using the stereotypes and problems of poorer women to accuse their class brethren of chauvinism. Telling you what to do? Who the f**k you kidding. Even the self-made independent ones often thrash men of their background simply to inflate their own achievements against the backdrop of some “system” – when, if anything, they have been over hyped and over promoted because of their gender. I can see a few dregs washing up on the comments already, sneakily excreting bile about Indian men, ever thirsty for pity or validation. Years of being goaded by the media into accepting ill-deserved praise (Poonjabi women sooo gorgeous, Bengali girls soooo cultured etc. etc.) and patronized in equal measure (honour killings, dowry, gendercide) has left these “victims” without a shred of pride or ownership in their culture.
POON-am Pondy is a cretin, whose transparent attempt at notoriety wouldn’t normally be given air. That it has exposes the media’s agenda to drag Hindu culture into the gutter by parading an endless stream of crass bitchy robots, engineered specifically, to disrupt all notions of normalcy in the gender politic. To make pronouncements about stripping in front of a group of grown men only smacks of low self esteem or moral degeneracy. A significant portion of strippers and glamour models in the West are exactly that, exploited single mothers. It’s not smart, sexy or bold; it is just smut and the men who have their tongues hanging out at the prospect need to stop pretending it is the culture warriors who are sexually frustrated.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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Jhumpa Lahiri is one of the very women I reference. Ridiculously over hyped, in part due to her first-mover advantage. But more so because she plays into Western moral superiority regarding the role of women in society.
Her work is filled with such hatred towards Indian culture specifically Indian men as partners, that it reflects badly on the Indian women who idolise her and in doing that expose their deep seated inferiority complexes.
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Hi gompiepie,
At least we both agree that Jhumpa Lahiri is over-hyped. :)
So—and I ask this with sincerity—what do you suggest we should do? If you could do whatever you wish, what is it that you would propose? What is the problem you see, and what is the solution?
Please don’t let the negative “votes” on your comment deter you. I am, as I’m sure many others are, curious about your viewpoint not because I agree with it, but because I know it exists and is real.
-n
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A tad angry, aren’t we?
Well, what would I know, I am just a regular Indian woman who has real problems to deal with every day of her life.
I’m too busy fighting social prejudice and discrimination to get my chuddies in a bunch about “the gender politic” and “Hindu culture”.
Pray, what exactly is Hindu culture?
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“You will never guilt us from making whores of liberal women
You will never prevent us from feminizing your male sympathizers
You will never shame us into inter-caste mongrelization
You will never turn us into cynics about the women of our community
You will never stop us from caring for our parents in their old age
You will never force us to disavow the religion of our ancestors
You will never lecture us on how Sita was an oppressed woman or a feminist.
And every provocation will be recorded, tallied up and redeemed with all the uncompromising certainty of the business end of a RSS lathi.”
I absolutely agree. This is the greatest tragedy. The patriarchal Indian male beast, with his massive sense of entitlement and brutal behavior is not going to be civilized any time soon. You can continue with your ridiculous narrow-minded, misogynistic protests, but millions of abused Indian women everywhere pay for this terrible truth. A few white men turning to women in Pattaya is no more indicative of any sociological ‘trend’ than the increasing number of Asian women in America who marry white men. And the number of white women turning to the Burkha is insignificant, and far outweighed by the large muslims countries banning the burkha.The ridiculous lack of weight to your arguments is indicative of your intelligence (or lack thereof)
And how nice of you to classify feminist internet women so quickly, but completely avoid classifying misogynist internet men like yourself.
The statistics are everywhere, India has some of the most skewed sex and literacy ratios and some of the highest rates of domestic abuse and marital rape in the world. How long will you bury your head in cultural jingoism? These are far more concrete, disturbing and realistic than any of the idiotic ‘social trends’ you are trying to come up with.
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And everything from the language you type in, to the technology you use is a product of the liberal atmosphere of the west that you hate so much.
Foolish, hypocritical cultural terrorist. It is men like you ironically, who bring the most shame on our culture while trying to ‘defend’ it.
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Good god. You really are a tortured soul.
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You obviously don’t read my blog. The Indian woman is many things and has no answer to this post of yours which is like receiving a phone call from some one who tells you to “say something” – say something what? I am already speaking. What do you want me to say specifically?
Hot debate. What do you think?
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Vidyut,
I browsed through your blog, but I didn’t find anything specific to Indian womanhood. In fact, from your blog’s name “aam janata”, it is not even clear that is being written by an Indian woman. :-(
-n
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@Vidyut: Your comment was exactly my reaction when I read this post.
@neo: My blog is not very ‘indian-womany’ (not sure what you want to hear) but few good places to start would be http://musafirhuyaaron.blogspot.com/2010/12/lies-and-liabilities.html http://musafirhuyaaron.blogspot.com/2011_03_01_archive.html
Also I too was dancing on the roads at 4 am near India gate and really wanted to write about it – Sometime soon maybe.
P.S.: Nice tweets and blog!
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The thing is the ridiculous don’t (doesn’t) get (to) the ridiculous. Which is also the point. But also not. Nice one.
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Koinon3a,
Nicely done! Why is it that when I see nice comments, they usually don’t have a blog linked to from their name? As an Indian man looking-to-read-nice-blogs, I’m outraged.
-n
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I see what you did there.
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Tantanoo,
Show-off! :P
-n
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Lovely post! I’ll think about it the next time i drink water ;)
Also, send B to my blog, we can read Murakami together!
Lastly, when I do finally come back to india, I totally want to meet you. As an incentive I’ll get you whatever you want from The Prolific Oven :)
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Rachna,
You Murakami fans stick together like a hard-boiled egg. :P
Don’t be alarmed if I come to meet you in my Darth Vader costume fully equipped with voice-obfuscation technology. :P
-n
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@Neo- translate! I’m clueless about Star Wars ;)
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Rachna,
Sorry, in that case our meeting is off. :)
-n
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Vidyut,
I’m sure many Indian women neoindian-blog-readers would like to read your thoughts on the following two questions:
1. How can they inject more Indian womanhood into what they write about? Say an Indian woman is writing a post about Java programming, or why she opposes the NATO actions in Libya. As a Indian woman java programmer, or an Indian woman international diplomacy blogger, how can they bring that distinct Indian woman flavor into their writing?
2. What specific differences do you see between an Indian woman and just a regular human being?
-n
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Neo, you are way to smart and cryptic for me. I’m not good at reading between your lines.
But as a non indian, wanting to see more of the culture of people in their writing I wonder if it is possible. I can barely distinguish the french blogs from the Australian, from the indian.The world is getting way too connected and homogenous…at least on a populist level, and when it comes to blogging, if you dive beyond the populist level… will they be blogging??
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This isn’t a serious post, is it? :D
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The Restless Quill,
What do you think? :)
-n
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Funny! As an Indian woman (by citizenship, don’t know about the characteristics of either being Indian or an Indian woman), who has grown up on Indian water (or lack of it), I often wonder what the big fuss is about water that causes diarrhea and cholera among the population. The fuss should be about women who have been clearing all the muck for ages!
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I’m not a writing coach dude. For me Indian woman isn’t something I “bring in”. It is something I am. It flavors me as a person as do many other things. I am a complex, transparent, beautiful person with many, many influences of which being Indian and woman are important ones.
I don’t write an Indian womanhood blog. I write about being a citizen of India, of which I and many other women are part. That suits my womanhood, because there is plenty of space to be me in all my diversity. One big thing about an Indian woman is that she rarely is only an Indian woman.
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Vidyut,
Well said!
-n
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Dear sir, this post has made me realize how much I have swerved from my path. I shall strive to think about the health of my family and the world every time I drink water. This is clearly the least I can do for my cultural heritage as an Indian woman.
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Btw I love the system you have which allows people to delete their posts within five minutes! Do you get notifications for the deleted comments as well?If I were you, I would be curious to read them.
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Teach me how to be an Indian woman and I’ll show you how to be human. :)
Yes, DG does feel lot many emotions every time she drinks water. She wonders if the water her folks drank in des was safe. If the women she met in Jaisalmer during her last trip still walk miles to fetch water or if the trains still bring sweet water via Pipar city to Jodhpur.
Peace,
Desi Girl
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Some context will help here…I read this twice and still didn’t get it. :-(
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Umm, the fundamental flaw in your post is assuming that an Indian Woman has an opinion.
The true Indian woman is one who completely obliterates her own identity and sense of self. Her thoughts and deeds are in harmony with those of the men-folk in her life and she knows, therefore, that there is no such thing as Indian Woman-ness. There is only Glorious Indian Heritage and Evil Western Influenced Woman.
This, Neo-ji, is the true reason why you see no Indian Woman-ness expressed anywhere. For examples of the second kind of woman, here’s a shameful plug for my blog.
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Simbly,
Well, how are young Indian women supposed to know how to systematically obliterate their individuality if you don’t write about it?
-n
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Oh, they know! It is the innate Indian-Women-ness they are born with.
And if they aren’t born with it then they do not deserve to be part of our Glorious Indian Culture. We do not blame them – they are to be pitied, for their (Indian? Probably not..) Mother did not set them good examples…
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I couldn’t agree more! But don’t forget the wonderful (fictional) role models we have as backup in case the mother is a brazen woman. Sita, Draupadi, Savitri et al.
At some level, I find it too draining to answer to each one of these idiots who has an opinion on how I should lead my life. I’d much rather spend the time and energy doing something actually important.
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[...] I read it quite often. However, here is a post in reply to Neo-ji’s question in response to my rather dramatic comment (quite a conversation is happening here), Neo asks an important question. “Well, how are [...]
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As an Indian woman living in the US I would like some background on this. Is “as an Indian woman” the new “aapko kaisa lag raha hai”?
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‘I fear the worst: that being an Indian woman will cease to mean anything more than being just a regular human being.’
I am not sure where you are coming from, but this last sentence confuses me. Dont you think everyone should live first as a human being? And if you ask me I feel Indian women have been denied just that in the past, there has been enough pressure to maintain this ‘Indian woman’ image, its time to let go and cherish the human in her.
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I think Neoji has his tongue firmly in his cheek and has been baiting all his readers all along.
I do think that he should be feathered and tarred for daring to suggest that Indian women should one day, just become regular human beings.
How dare he? Who will uphold our Glorious Indian Culture in that case?
Who will make the chapattis and undergo sex-determination tests if Indian women become human beings!!
Shame, I say!
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One for the feminists, hey?
This is nicely done. Too bad it sounds so much like the nonsense which is routinely spouted in the Indian political landscape.
It’s almost impossible to satirize sexism and misogyny in this country, since about 70% of the people pretend that no such thing exists. The other 30% are so used to ridiculous representations of women, that nothing seems too ridiculous to be true anymore.
So yeah,
Sad. Funny. LOL. Welcome to my reader.
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Hi PT,
Writing satire is hard and thankless; you can judge my predicament from some of the comments on this post. :)
The only way I keep myself motivated is by imagining that every post has that one perfect reader who will “get it” and make it all worth it. For this post, it was you. Thank you. :)
-n
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“It’s almost impossible to satirize sexism and misogyny in this country, since about 70% of the people pretend that no such thing exists. The other 30% are so used to ridiculous representations of women, that nothing seems too ridiculous to be true anymore.”
This is very sad, but very true. Wonderfully put. Most Bollywood movies I’ve seen make this post (when read without any irony) look like feminist writing. I imagine if this was posted as an article on the TOI website or something, there would be comments like:
“Very good article TOI. The modern indian woman is very aggressive, neglecting the family, harassing husband. We men are completely helpless, because we cannot ask for divorce with our dowry laws.” and a lot of other such utter rubbish.
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Can you not be a little less meta and be a little more meetha? – hehe I like!
Good one sir! I was dying to read the comments half way through the post. ;)
Modern Indian Women ‘are’ different! The lack of a template makes them the special people that they are. Purnima nailed it aptly above, a peep in the 7:20 Virar Local (Mumbai), chopping vegetables, checking homework.. puts my collective time sheets to shame.
Going ahead they may turn into normal human beings, but the generation past was anything but that.
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Neo,
I agree to almost everything you mentioned. Yes, Indian woman has to be much more than just kids-husband-a software career, she has to be much more than Shobha De, Kirna Bedi..
She has been the epitome of excellence and she has to maintain that but I feel many women think that neglecting family or may be being more western socio is part of the Modern Indian Women which is not true. She has to carry everything together to become The Women and not just another human being ;)
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It’s your own fault if you choose to take Jhumpa’s references to “Indian men” personally. As an Indian man, I don’t have to read a B-grade author to know that many Indian men do exhibit a tremendous amount of sexism. It also goes without saying that many don’t. I’m reasonably confident that I belong to the latter category and therefore, most of the criticism of “Indian men” does not apply to me. I simply don’t fit the mould of what she means by that phrase.
Ironically, it is you who come across as having a complex. Western moral superiority regarding the role of women in society is quite justified. They are not the ones who are facing honour killings, foeticides and Pramod Muthalik. That’s us. India, where women are still burnt for dowry, beaten for burning dinner and divorced if they cannot cook dinner.
Might want to get your head out of the sand, mate.
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Let’s handle this one by one, shall we?
You say, “Check the rape statistics of USA vs Saudi Arabia as a first step in your education”
Are you convinced, then, that all rapes in India are reported? Since you appear to be a rational, data driven person, I’d love to see some statistics from you on that as well. How many rapes in India are actually reported? Are marital rapes reported? Most importantly, how many rape cases are actually resolved? How many rape victims are provided the support needed? How many rape victims are raped by the police they go to? What “class” of women are raped in India?
A second part of the same issue is there are other things that constitute sexual harassment. It’s not rape alone. “Eve Teasing” which no doubt in your mind is a harmless activity that boys will indulge in and women make too much of is quite unique to India. It cuts across all class boundaries. What is your take on that? Are women dragged out of pubs in Western countries and branded as “loose women” the way the senas of the various Gods decide they have the authority to do here in India?
You say, “There are too many socio-economic-biological-political-culture-religious variables to dumb it all down to sexism in an additive manner.”
Could you check then to see which districts have the most skewed gender ratios? What would you make of the fact that some the most affluent regions of the country – South Delhi, the IT districts of Hyderabad – have the worst gender ratios? Pardon my poor inference skills but it seems to me that the more money we have, the easier it gets for us to kill baby girls.
You say, “Indian women don’t face foeticide any more than American children face the threat of the morning-after pill.”
The typical plan B pill prevents conception. It does not induce abortion. There are abortion pills but they’re not the plan B that you’re referring to.
You say, “When you’re confident that none of it applies to you why then do the women, of your class, insist it applies to them?”
Because women of PT’s class still do come across men of all classes. Including chauvinists like you.
You say, “Your mealy-mouthed attempt to sound “reasonable” when every sentence fails to stand up to scrutiny is just noise. ”
Your mealy-mouthed attempt to sound “reasonable” when every sentence fails to stand up to scrutiny is just noise.
ps: Apologize for the extra long comment but sometimes, I just can’t stick around and watch.
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Thankyou for the extra long comment!~ :)
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Bleh, stupid BlackBerry. Last comment was meant as a reply to gompiepie.
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Attitudes toward rape vary considerably across cultures and what is considered rape in the US won’t necessarily be considered rape in Saudi Arabia or Afghanistan. It’s a well known fact that rapes in India are under-reported, as are crimes like domestic violence and sexual harassment (“eve-teasing”). One in five Indian men admit to marital rape and one in four admit that they have committed sexual violence at some point of their lives (see link below). Education, eh?
Sexism is discrimination on the basis of biological sex. I dunno if you would agree, but maybe, just maybe, killing someone for being a particular sex seems a little discriminatory to me.
I did not make any claims for my “class”. I made a claim for myself, personally. My own family for the most part, is both upper middle class and intensely patriarchal. Women of the socio economic category I belong to can and do face plenty of abuse.
Now unless there has been a drastic change in government policy, the nationality of “Punjabi culture women” is Indian. The same goes for women from Rajasthan, Haryana, Uttar Pradesh, Bihar, Maharashtra and Tamil Nadu. Each of these states have seen honour killings.
Correct me if I’m wrong, but most “morning-after” pills don’t selectively eliminate a particular sex. That’s a very poor argument. By your logic, every man who masturbates is guilty of female foeticide, since those sperm cells could have turned into female embryos.
Stereotypes? What stereotypes? Survey after survey shows that Indian marriages are some of the most inequitable in the world. Here’s the most recent one I could find, and there are many, many more out there.
Ad Hominem doesn’t quite cut it outside of a playground setting.
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seems like a pyshco Indian Homemaker
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If you were serious SERIOUS when you were writing this blog, then I have to say I refuse to write about it. I do not have anything to say to those who suddenly wake up from sleep and say, “hey! Something has to be written about Indian women!”
When I drink water all that comes to my mind is to quench my thirst and get back to whatever productive(?) work I was doing and that’s it. If that makes me shallow, that’s what I am.
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You haven’t heard of this figure of speech called hyperbole, have you?
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Looks like this is the question of the decade :-)
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a hair raising read! and evocative!
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RIP your mom.
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Wow, and your mom did a great job with you. Such breeding! Which parenting book did she read?
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As an Indian woman, I would say…
When an Indian woman drinks water, she’s not only thinking about whether it’s safe for her folks and quenching her thirst, but she sometimes is also quenching her hunger…this is not a fiction. but a reality…after feeding her family, she is left with an empty vessel/plate…how do you think she kills her hunger? I have seen this happening…n many a times I have given my share to the people around me myself…this is what signifies an Indian woman…
And if you ask what needs to be done for Indian woman, I would say (which may not be directly related to the significance I have mentioned above), stop questioning every move of hers…give her some freedom…and most of all respect her…She is taken for granted, I tell you…Stop saying “kitchen work? Hah! That’s expected out of her” why? Who has laid these rules? This is still happening all around me…And my dim brain fails to understand this…even she was studying when an Indian man was, even she was playing when an Indian man was n even she was working as a professional when an Indian man was…so when an Indian man might not even be able to boil water on a stove why is an authenticate five course meal expected to be cooked by her? I would ask the Indian society to stop laying such bland rules for an Indian woman…Let her grow, she needs to…Give her some breathing space…
And if you ask what I should do for myself (that is for an Indian woman) I would stop obliging the society by following their stubborn-iniquitous rules n stop listening to them telling me relentlessly what to do and what not to do…We are learned enough to understand our responsibilities and handle them. let us(no, We can) make our own choices!
To this “Writing satire is hard and thankless; you can judge my predicament from some of the comments on this post.” I would say, satire is never readily/easily ascribed but somebody needs to do the unsympathetic questioning and reasoning for once! So, I really appreciate it…
P.S.: If even a percent of this changes, there won’t be a need for such questions when an Indian woman is drinking that life-sustaining nectar, water ;-)
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‘I beg you to inject more Indian womanhood in your writing.’
What is this Indian womanhood you speak of? How do you categorize being “Indian”?
I might drive a Chevy and work in skirts, but when I come home, at the end of the day I am still an Indian woman. I still love cricket, I yearn for dosas and the salty air of Madras, I love tearjerker Mani Ratnam movies, and even if I don’t, I’m still Indian.
‘I fear the worst: that being an Indian woman will cease to mean anything more than being just a regular human being.’
And why should this mean the worst? Being a regular human being is a lot more complicated than being an achiever, an overachiever or a good-for-nothing-scoundrel.
Perhaps it’s not the time for self-awakening or consciousness of who we are, but rather the freedom to remain as we are that matters?
:)
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Ha. I like what you did here. And Murakami confuses me.
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It seems satirical to me.
If yes: Brilliantly done :)
If no: err.. first time reader you see :) will visit again, I promise.
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TF,
I think you got it right. If so, thanks. If not, I’ll try harder next time. :P
-n
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Hi Neo
I just chanced across your blog this morning. I found this post very thought-provoking probably because I am Indian and I am a woman.
Quoting you; “B. is a smart young woman, but she spends all her time reading Richard Powers, Cormac McCarthy and Haruki Murakami. How is this going to help her become a modern Indian woman?” – Doesn’t that depend on how you define a ‘modern Indian woman’ ? or rather how she chooses to define it? It is another issue that she has not yet defined it for herself but that does not detract from how individualistic the concept is.
And I guess the take-away question from your post, as I understand is – how does being an Indian or exposure to Indian culture/roots affect your womanhood? Because if not for the underlying ‘Indian-ness’, at some levels, being a woman is pretty much the same across all women. You also mention wanting to educate Indian women of their true identity. I am not entirely sure a didactic approach would help, considering an identity usually evolves over experiences and is often personalized. Also, may be the ‘Indian’ element of the Indian womanhood, is more a way of a life so to speak and not really a prescription that can be laid out and described in prose. I have more to say but I will wait to hear what you have to say, before I ramble on !
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hmmmmm, it sounds a little paradoxical, doesn’t it….at one point you agree with msalliance… and at another you want indian women to express their feelings.
Life would be much better if we start accepting people as they are and not demand (rather control) them to do something you feel should be done.
Let them just be… can we do that?
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Go talk to dee dee ji who lives on Jogiwara road in Dharamsala. Ask her how she feels when her pipes don’t send her water because monsoon didn’t piss hard enough or the snow just didn’t cover the mountains deep enough.
Go ask the women in Garou how they feel every morning when they walk down to the old well for their water, some still carrying water in earthen jugs.
Go to a village and ask all of the women to share their stories about their lives. Record their stories, tell the young women in your life, better yet, bring a few along.
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Hi Neo,
I agree with your point.
When I think of an ideal Indian woman, even I think of my mom.
Its easy for us to expect an Indian woman to be a “Indian Woman” , but being in someone’s shoes and walking around, makes you realize that its not easy to be what people expect out of you, rather than what you expect out of yourself.
Might be related, may not be related, here is a post from the other side of the fence:
http://yelgee.blogspot.com/2011/04/what-did-shrek-loose-and-what-would-i.html
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I have to thank you (and many of the commenters above) for providing a much needed laugh. And smack myself on the forehead for neglecting your blog for so long.
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Well…I am no good at understanding satire and reading between the lines but from what I could understand, I get what you are saying. However, having met people from all kinds of cultures (east/west) I realize that despite the westernization ‘Indianness’ is something too inherent to Indian women brought up in India. Of course there are exceptions. Most Indian women I know still go the extra mile to make things work and adjust as compared to other ‘human beings’ of other cultures.
(Too much of a generalization I know. Yet by and large I find it true)
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as an indian american, how do you feel when you drink water?
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i thot this post was upto the standards i have come to expect of neo – but i am curious abt one thing:
the writer says, “we Indian non-women” – so is she not indian? if not, why is she striving to “educate young Indian women about their true identity as young Indian women”?
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Quick suggestion:
The blog entries on your page appears as if they are some kind of single paged poem. I tried to figure out the meaning of all the titles as single poem and I thought may be I am not smart enough to understand these kind of poems.
Having said that, a blue colo(u)red or underlined or some kind of distinction or any improvement in layout would be appreciated. Anyway, end of the suggestion.
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