Shefaly (69)
Easily Amused (61)
Roshni (50)
Mallika (27)
Kislay Chandra (23)
gauri (22)
Gori Girl (22)
Dinesh (21)
Joanne (19)Useful phrases for foreigners visiting India
Are you visiting India for the first time ? Here are some phrases that you might want to learn to say in Hindi.
“Where’s the restroom?”
“Hi, I’d like to book a pre-paid taxi.”
“Can you take me to Le Meridien?”
“No, thank you. I don’t need an escort for tonight.”
“Wow, you look beautiful. Come on in!”
“Good morning. Your daughter ? Wait, I thought she was the escort!”
“Where are you taking me?”
“What is this priest saying?”
“No! I have a girlfriend in San Jose! Please!”
“It’s not about you, Priya. I find you very attractive. Please don’t cry.”
“Oh god, please don’t stop.”
“So all this time you thought I was asking you if you were taking vitamin pills?”
“Push.”
“I need an admission form for Kindergarten, please.”
“Give me the remote.”
“Just a few more minutes on Twitter, honey. I’ll be right there!”
“Of course you don’t look fat!”
“Okay, I’ll shut up. Just let me in the room!”
(END)
*
(Based on an idea by Simon Rich in “Ant Farm”)
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Category: culture | Tags: bombay, desi, foreigners, humor, India, mumbai, white 18 comments »
January 27th, 2010 at 7:00 pm
Would have loved to see the Hindi translation below the English . Nice list thanks
[Reply]
January 27th, 2010 at 8:51 pm
You forgot that when the foreigner is in Mumbai he also should know how to say “I don’t know marathi” to cabbies! Oh wait.. that could be counter productive.. my bad
Great post..!
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January 27th, 2010 at 9:09 pm
Sometimes it’s best if everyone doesn’t speak the same language.
-Neo
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January 29th, 2010 at 1:36 am
FYI Most cabbies in Bombay don’t speak Marathi!
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January 27th, 2010 at 11:09 pm
I didn’t need any of those phrases, fortunately — that’s because I learned how to say “Stop” in Hindi. Useful for autowallahs and so much more…
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January 28th, 2010 at 12:37 am
And a few phrases that a foreigner shouldn’t ever bother asking an Indian (either in English or Hindi)… “what’s the time?”, “what time will it be ready?” and “what time should we meet?”
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January 28th, 2010 at 10:39 am
I so agree..or just make a mental note to add 30 minutes to whatever the response is..
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January 28th, 2010 at 8:25 am
They should make this into a movie. Wait… desis aren’t manipulative.
We are “dudh ka dhula hua”. If you are visiting India for the first time please learn this phrase and difference between “dhula” (purified, chaste) and “dulha” (bridegroom)
[Reply]
January 28th, 2010 at 8:51 am
ROFL @ dhula vs. dulha! So much for dudh ka dhula hua; this one looks more like dude ka dulha hua
g
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January 28th, 2010 at 1:09 pm
Well, the bride will be hoping for both “dude ka dulha hua” and “dude ka dhula hua”.
-Neo
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January 29th, 2010 at 4:15 am
If a bride is seeking a “dude ka dulha” she is barking up the wrong tree. She is seeking “dude as dulha”.
January 28th, 2010 at 8:48 am
Your story is nice, but if I were you, I wouldn’t scare them with those last 6 phrases, true as they must be. It’s still not too late; do you want to replace it with ““Where’s the restroom?”- “Hi, I’d like to book a pre-paid taxi.” – “Can you take me to the airport NOW?””?
The sequence sounds suspiciously credible –
youyour friends must be adventurousg
PS: Isn’t your son in Kindergarten? Oh that’s the friend’s son, never mind.
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January 28th, 2010 at 10:36 am
Another useful phrase would be “I don’t know Hindi” (in Hindi) if things get out of hand!
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January 28th, 2010 at 11:17 am
mujhe hindi aathaa hai, Jaatha nahin !!
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January 30th, 2010 at 4:20 am
How about
” Bhagwan ke liye mujhe chhod do”
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January 31st, 2010 at 9:49 am
Hahahahahahaha… Great post. Just discovered your blog. Will be back!
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January 31st, 2010 at 8:44 pm
Very interesting blog.
Perhaps an addition would be “Nahi, ganja nahi chahiye!”
[Reply]
February 1st, 2010 at 4:44 pm
Lol I just went through your archives and your posts are hilarious! How come you have no filmy phrases? “kaminey mein tera khoon pee jaoonga”!!
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