Shefaly (69)
Easily Amused (61)
Roshni (50)
Mallika (27)
Kislay Chandra (23)
gauri (22)
Gori Girl (22)
Dinesh (21)
Joanne (19)What people say to you when you tell them that you don’t believe in God
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Category: Atheism | Tags: Atheism, desi, funny, God, Hinduism, humor 30 comments »
January 26th, 2010 at 12:47 pm
I get a pretty standard argument that there is some supreme power but I refrain to quip why doesn’t that supreme power light my bulb in load shedding.
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January 26th, 2010 at 12:53 pm
“Q: How many true believers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: So, you do believe in electricity, you’re not an atheist after all!”
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January 26th, 2010 at 12:57 pm
neo, although you are saying it in jest that is essentially the Bible, the mantra of the believer.
“You say you don’t believe in organized religion, well don’t you believe in atheism?”
No need to point out the flaws in reasoning there!
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January 26th, 2010 at 1:03 pm
The logic of the believer is the same as the logic of the screenplay writer who wrote the “god-awful” Bollywood movie “Luck”.
In “Luck”, the hero is a poor loser who gets denied a visa to go to the US three times in a row. He absolutely has to go to raise x crore rupees to save his house from neelami. No need to belabor the point, you’ve seen it before. Well, it turns out that he has killer luck at dice, craps, shooting games etc and so he is recruited by the mob. That is the “logic” of the movie and everyone nods, “that is one lucky guy”
The believer is in the same boat. He or she prays for divine intervention for the small stuff but fails to realize the pitiful situation caused by The Benevolent One.
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January 26th, 2010 at 4:04 pm
Well said! It’s a good thing God doesn’t bless the believers with an understanding of irony.
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January 26th, 2010 at 3:55 pm
This is seriously going to offend people who say “Are you really looking to start an existence Vs. non-existence of God argument? Because you’re not going to get it
” for not including them in that pie chart.
-gauri
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January 26th, 2010 at 4:02 pm
Funny, thats what they said at the start of the last Diwal!
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January 26th, 2010 at 4:19 pm
Once you’ve crossed kaalapaani and tasted the forbidden meat you’ve already offended everyone you know in the “home country”. Why bother worrying?
Strangely enough, I was accosted by a desi at the door of my local supermarket in Northern Virginia of all places. He wanted me to go to a local temple while I just wanted to get back home to heat my microwave pizza. Whole affair reminded me of a pyramid scheme.
But maybe it was an omen?
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January 26th, 2010 at 5:15 pm
Fear not my son, Jesus will save you
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January 26th, 2010 at 6:18 pm
Add to the list: Aww, did someone forget to hug you when you were growing up?
Or.
Wow, you must have gone through some tough times to hold such dark thoughts.
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January 27th, 2010 at 2:13 am
@thefob
“She was always such a normal child …”
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January 26th, 2010 at 8:04 pm
Add to that, “What? Really?” like they’d never thought that might be possible.
And the best one, “I’ll make you believe,” with a knowing nod and a smug smile at the thought of ‘educating’ me.
Most of the time, people just assume I’m a believer and invoke God’s blessings on me. Sigh.
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January 27th, 2010 at 2:14 am
@unmana
The thing that attracts me to science is that it works even if you don’t believe in it.
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January 27th, 2010 at 6:01 am
Amen!
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January 27th, 2010 at 3:51 am
Hmm.if I speak it with my best friends, they show me the middle finger and I mistook it that they are asking me to look up at the sky and see God.
But..Most of the time..when I say I dont belive in god…It usually begins an intellectual debate and I end up pitying my chemistry madamm and physics madam
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January 27th, 2010 at 7:50 am
I see a long queue of fathers of nubile young women here
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January 27th, 2010 at 9:17 am
Yes, but not their dads!
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January 27th, 2010 at 9:59 am
These are some of the best comments I’ve read in your blog.
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January 27th, 2010 at 10:39 am
God brings out the best in you
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January 27th, 2010 at 10:50 am
They also say, You are so arrogant because you make a lot of money and things worked out for you in your life.
Having this said, I have a niece in Cupertino here who ruined our ( my sis and ours) last years Diwali fun.
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January 27th, 2010 at 4:33 pm
Yes – To be humble is to be skeptical about stuff that has overwhelming scientific proof, and to be sure about stuff that has none.
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January 27th, 2010 at 3:13 pm
I thought Diwali was about fireworks and loads of food! Where does ‘God’ come in?!
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January 27th, 2010 at 4:32 pm
Hi Roshni,
The God part is done by the time you wake up for lunch.
-N
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January 28th, 2010 at 12:54 pm
Ah!! *relieved*!!
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January 28th, 2010 at 3:11 am
Neo: By only including ‘what they say’ you do a great disservice to the not inconsiderable numbers, who suddenly wear a puzzled, befuddled look and are totally dumb-founded by the directness of what they have just heard. Or may be that only happens in the UK, you know, “mustn’t grumble” and all that.
Although I have heard one priceless one but this would, in your research design, be have to be amongst prompted options: “What? Oh well, we don’t care either way, but we have got to get our kids into the state-funded Church of England school. Easy for people like you who don’t have such decisions to make… Sigh!”.
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January 28th, 2010 at 9:52 pm
I agree with Shefaly. Don’t forget the power of the silent stare, my friend.
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January 29th, 2010 at 10:47 am
Also: “I’ll pray for you! God bless.”
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February 1st, 2010 at 2:40 am
What about Goddesses, Do you atleast believe in them?
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February 3rd, 2010 at 10:04 pm
hahhaa…. So true, specially the diwali one!!… though haven’t experienced the “green” part of the pie chart!!
Another one, from personal experiences is “Today too??” as if they had prayed that God give me a visit in my dreams and ask me to get ‘converted’
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February 3rd, 2010 at 11:26 pm
Sid – ROFL. “Today too?” is really funny. It’s like asking “oh, you believe in gravity today, too?”
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